How to Stay Connected After Baby: Strengthening Your Relationship with the Gottman Method

Bringing a baby into the world is one of life’s most profound and joyful experiences—but it can also be one of the most challenging times for a couple. Many new parents are surprised by how much their relationship changes after the arrival of a child. Between sleepless nights, shifting roles, and less time for one another, even strong relationships can feel strained. The Gottman Method’s Bringing Baby Home program was designed to help couples navigate this transition with understanding, teamwork, and care.

Research from Drs. John and Julie Gottman has shown that two-thirds of couples report a decline in relationship satisfaction after their first baby. This doesn’t mean the love is gone—it means the stress, fatigue, and lack of connection need attention. The Bringing Baby Home approach helps parents learn to manage conflict gently, express appreciation, and stay emotionally connected even when time and energy are limited. Couples practice turning toward each other instead of away, cultivating small daily moments of connection that build trust and closeness.

Another key aspect of the Gottman program is helping partners understand each other’s inner worlds—how they each experience the changes that come with parenthood. This includes acknowledging differing needs for affection, support, and rest, and learning to express those needs clearly without blame. When couples understand and validate one another, they strengthen their “friendship system,” the foundation of a resilient and loving partnership.

In therapy, couples can learn to balance caring for their relationship alongside caring for their baby. By using Gottman tools and exercises, new parents can build a shared sense of meaning, support one another as teammates, and nurture both their love and their growing family. With intentional effort, communication, and compassion, the early years of parenthood can deepen—not diminish—the connection between partners.